I confess. Yesterday, I scammed an old lady at work. She came up to the register and handed me one of many $50 bills in her wallet before I even rang up her items. As I rung her stuff up, I told her that one of her items did not have a label and she would need to go and get another one. When she came back, I told her that the total was $45.87. Forgetting that she already gave me $50 cash, she reached back into her purse to hand me another $50. I gave her her change, and made out with an extra $50. HAHA, whose bad!

So I am taking anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds which, when mixed with alcohol, increase its effects. So I pretty much black out every time I party. One night I was at my friends house and she was having a kickback but there was a LOT of booze, and I drank a lot of that booze. So before I know it I’m on the couch having sex with some guy. I had obviously blacked out, and come to right in the middle of sex. I did not plan on having sex that night and I didn’t really want to. So, when I came to, needless to say I was pretty surprised. I actually made him stop and I got up and left the room.

He had a little bit too much to drink that night too, so he heads to the bathroom to puke his guts out, where he stayed the rest of the night. Next moments I remember are making out with some other guy, and then I black out again. When I come to this time I’m on that same couch, fucking the second guy. I make him stop too, and get up and leave the room.

I have no idea where he went, but he left the room so I went back to the couch to go to sleep. What makes it worse was both of them were still at the house in the morning… awkward!!!

Yesterday, I was babysitting these children that live on my street. The youngest of the children is 4 yeard old. The others are 6 and 9. Before bed, I said to the 4 year old “Do you got your book?” So I could read to her. She said “Yes, I HAVE my book. I’m 19 and I was grammatically corrected by a 4 year old.

I confess! I am so desperate for attention that I will degrade myself. I was in one of my guy friends dorm last night for a get together. Everyone was drinking, except for me. I don’t drink. Everyone, is tipsy or drunk, and beginning to get sloppy, this guy I was sitting next to is drunk and starts to fondle me, touching my legs and breast. I confess, I liked the physical attention, so I let him continue to fondle me and picked up an empty beer bottle to look like I was drunk and I wasn’t just consciously aware of it. I played drunk so he would touch me.

I had this date with this sexy girl last night, and  I definitely planned on making it romantic and doing some making out! Me and the girl were to meet at the movies for a 10pm show. Not only does she show up late, but she brings two obnoxious friends with her! I pay for my “date” and refuse to pay for her friends. So to get me back, one of the friends sits between me and ”my date” in the movie, and wont move! Then when I ask “my date” to sit next to me she says “I’m cool.” Since it was raining when we left, they asked me to get MY car and drop them off to THEIR car which was further away, I said sure, and never picked them up. I got a text message like and hour later asking where I was? LMAO! They deserved it!

I have a confession, I’m not exactly confessing something I did, but something I know about. There is a certain Chinese restaurant that I live next to, here in Miami. The restaurant’s kitchen is literally on the other side of my bedroom. Every night, around 9:30pm, I her animal howls and screams for at least 10 minutes. Not only that, people in my building arer always posting “Lost Animal” signs. Think twice before ordering the Kung Pao Chicken.

Ima dude and my mom is a nurse and when i was a teenager, she used to come back home with stories of the patients she had and they would always have an std. She told me all the worst syphilis, gonnorhea and herpes stories and in the end it left me terrified of sex let alone intense physical contact. Flash forward…now I am a 29 year old virgin who still sees mom everyday bcuz i still live with her. And she has the audacity to ask me why im not with someone. Thanks mom..thanks alot. fucked me up

I will answer the question by saying that I have a “sitting stick.” Now one might ask what a sitting stick is. Its about a 9 ft long pole (one end has a grabber & the other a rope) i use when i sitting on the couch to have everything i need around me without getting up or using any real muscle. I believe this is how i gained 15 pounds this summer.

ps. I also have an shorter extra “sitting stick” next to me to grab my other sitting stick just incase it is far away…yea im serious about my sitting

Okay, I don’t know why I am posting this up, but its something that I just just need to get off of my chest. I am a heterosexual male with a gorgeous girlfriend. I wear boxers about 90% of the time. My confession is that I like to wear women’s silk panties under my boxers because they hold me in more comfortably. I kno I’m not gay though because I don’t like to wear pink panties, just dark colors.

I am about to dump my girlfriend. Yesterday, I found some used condom rappers under her bed. Wouldnt be a big deal but these were magnums and I could never fill those out. When I found it, it hurt my heart a little but mainly my pride. I hope these “pills” work for my next girlfriend.

when I was a little boy I used to fill a cup full of ice cubes and just pour them into my mouth and back into the cup like i see a lot of people do. Well, one day a miscalculation occured and one of those cubes slipped back and got lodged in my throat. As I looked around choking i realized my family was in the other room. I was going to get some hot water but it would take too long. Welp at this point i realized thats its over and felt like an idiot that i would die from an ice cube… i wriggled around and eventually passed out from it, and layed there on the kitchen floor with a cup full of ice cubes. The only reason i survived was because it melted a lil. I woke up on that floor later on. I never told my family…never again mr.ice cube never again…

I once painted a dormmates car windows with egg whites, put grease on his door handles and poured flour into his air vents for when he turned on his air con just for the fun of it. While it resulted in one of the funniest scenes that the school hall of residence witnessed I felt really bad after the fact.

Since the very first time i saw my roommate, i never liked her and looked for a reason to spite her. After finding out that my roommate once stole my lunch out of the fridge, for the next two weeks I took something out of his lunch and wiped it on the bathroom floor as a way to get back at her. I only stopped after she got violently ill.

I work as a cook in a fast-food restaurant and cut my finger — blood spewing everywhere. I had to put on a band aid. Then I had to wash some rice. Later, I noticed that the band aid was missing. When I was preparing a new bowl of beef with rice, I saw the band aid cooked in the rice! The blood juice got soaked up in the rice. I just plucked it out of the bowl and served it.

I work for a restaurant as the mascot, i had a bad day at work because the kids were being excessively obnovious as usual. i got so mad that I squeezed a kids’ hand so hard he started crying. I then whispered to him through the costume that if he told his parents I would come after him. He left the place crying pointing back at me, i played it off by dancing my and singing to other kids. Is parent thought the kid was being a naughty lol. This is my confession

Today, I prank called one of my friends and impersonated an agent from the CDC, telling him we were going to quarantine him because of his outbreak. Finally, he smarts up and asks me for my number so he can call me back, so I give him a fake. 5 minutes later, I call him back and tell him that I host a radio station that prank called him and he would win a $5,000 consolation prize. I told him our mutual friend set him up. I told him to stay on the line to find out how to get his winnings, LOL! He really thinks he won something! Ha!

You know when someone calls you and you miss the call, but when you call them back like 2 seconds later they don’t answer? And you’re thinking in your head, they just called me, they must be sitting next to the phone… Well, I purposely don’t pick up the phone when you call back. Not me! I sit there and watch it ring. Maybe, just maybe if I’m not too pissed that you didn’t answer the first time, I’ll call you back in 5 or 10 minutes!

Before heading out to a party yersterday, I promised my best friend I wouldn’t let her hook up with any guys because she got her bout of STD a few weeks ago. After we had lots of drinks, she started acting slutty as usual, however when i tried to stop her she led about 30 people in a chant of “cockblock” after I wouldnt let her go home with some random dude. That stupid bitch!

Last night was my girlfriends birthday. I’m broke so my gift to her was that I would do anything sexually that she asked me to. She asked me to put on her lingerie, make-up and a wig, then she just wanted to make out, “no dick” she said. I’m confused.

I have a 8 year old son and I made a vow never to let him beat me at anything so that he thinks im always right. Yesterday, we were playing checkers and I saw that he was about to win. So i lied to him and told him get my cell phone for me before he realized he was about to win. I changed around the pieces and then scolded him for losing in such a stupid way…Daddy knows best..